AfterEstella Montclair is killed in a texting and driving crash, what remains of herface and body is devastating. But not all of her has died. During the firstmonth after her death, Estella's spirit travels among her living friends andfamily. Her best friends Zara, Eva and Jett show her how pain and sorrow canbreak apart or strengthen a bond. She also sees for the first time that losscan spark revenge, catastrophe can come without warning, and we all havesecrets. She wonders if her chance for love with Phoenix has passed her by, andif out of sight truly means out of mind. And maybe one day the girl who causedher death will admit her mistake. While adjusting to a new state of being,Estella struggles to face the limitations that come with death, but blossoms byrecognizing she can still touch the lives of the people she once knew so well.Buy Links: Amazon Barnes and Noble IndieBound
Excerpt:
That night the clouds
looked grayish purple as I glided toward Willow Lake and rested under the first
willow tree I saw. The willow tree’s branches were droopy from the snow and
rain, and ice dangled off of them like half-frozen snakes. I spent the rest of
the night there among the rain, earth, and wind, pondering if I was using my
energy fully and in the right ways, and trying to understand exactly what I
was.
At first, it was
difficult for me to come up with a clear resolve as to what I had left to offer
the living. Maybe it was too early for me to fully know. In the cold of the
night air surrounding me I focused on the liveliness I felt, the energy running
through me. I considered what was keeping me going and what I might have gained
in death.
I was still able to
feel emotions about the things I saw and the people I knew. The feelings
charged through me intensely. I still had my ability to care; it was always
with me, as if it never left me, even after death.
What did it mean?
It had to mean
something.
I could feel that
there was more to do and give, but without an instinct as to how. I hadn’t
thought much about my purpose when I was alive, and I wasn’t sure what my
purpose was now, but I decided in that moment of emptiness and loneliness under
the willow tree to give finding my soul’s purpose a try.
When I was alive, it
seemed that my purpose had been based around maintaining my body and keeping it
toned and lean, keeping my stomach muscles tight and legs strong in preparation
for the next track meet.
Now, absent of an
earthly body, I had to discover myself beyond my verbal and physical
attributes.
I had tried to brush
up against, curl up next to, and be close to my friends and family, but my
warmth obviously wasn’t something that skin could feel so easily. There was a
barrier of muscle, vessels, glands, and bone between us. Their nerve endings
hadn’t felt the pressure of my touch or registered that I was near them. I
realized I had been expecting the wrong things, trying to be what I wasn’t, and
not noticing the right path.
Somewhere deeper
within them, in a place that I could relate to better, was where they’d feel
and hear me.
When my soul did
interact with another’s soul, I wondered if I could speak to it and be heard.
Maybe I could send a vibe of my compassion outward, like an electron traveling
through a circuit, and it could reach them. I wanted my aura to have a positive
effect on others.
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